feat: report pending direct-message key exchanges

[RCGV1]

Summary

• add an additive QueueStatus.state lifecycle enum
• report KEY_EXCHANGE against the original mesh packet ID while a sender requests a missing recipient public key

Compatibility

Existing clients ignore the new field and retain current queue-status behavior. Updated clients can update the existing pending message row by mesh_packet_id; no message retry or duplicate ID is required.

Validation

• npx --yes @bufbuild/buf lint

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