curse.lua

#!/usr/bin/env lua
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-- Shakespearian Curse Generator -- Based on lists compiled by Jerry Maguire, --
--     English teacher at Center Grove High School in Greenwood, Indiana.     --
-- Public domain implementations by Trevor Stone http://trevorstone.org/curse --
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WordList = {}
WordList.__index = WordList

function WordList:new(...)
  return setmetatable({...}, self)
end

function WordList:pick()
  return self[math.random(1, #self)]
end

adjectives1 = WordList:new("artless", "bawdy", "beslubbering", "bootless", "brazen",
  "churlish", "cockered", "clouted", "craven", "currish", "dankish",
  "dissembling", "distempered", "droning", "errant", "fawning", "fitful",
  "fobbing", "froward", "frothy", "gleeking", "gnarling", "goatish",
  "gorbellied", "greasy", "grizzled", "haughty", "hideous", "impertinent",
  "infectious", "jaded", "jarring", "knavish", "lewd", "loggerheaded",
  "lumpish", "mammering", "mangled", "mewling", "paunchy", "peevish",
  "pernicious", "prating", "pribbling", "puking", "puny", "purpled", "quailing",
  "queasy", "rank", "reeky", "roguish", "roynish", "ruttish", "saucy",
  "sottish", "spleeny", "spongy", "surly", "tottering", "unmuzzled", "vacant",
  "vain", "venomed", "villainous", "waggish", "wanton", "warped", "wayward",
  "weedy", "wenching", "whoreson", "yeasty")

adjectives2 = WordList:new("base-court", "bat-fowling", "beef-witted",
  "beetle-headed", "boil-brained", "bunched-backed", "clapper-clawed",
  "clay-brained", "common-kissing", "crook-pated", "dismal-dreaming",
  "dizzy-eyed", "dog-hearted", "dread-bolted", "earth-vexing", "elf-skinned",
  "empty-hearted", "evil-eyed", "eye-offending", "fat-kidneyed", "fen-sucked",
  "flap-mouthed", "fly-bitten", "folly-fallen", "fool-born", "full-gorged",
  "guts-griping", "half-faced", "hasty-witted", "heavy-handed", "hedge-born",
  "hell-hated", "horn-mad", "idle-headed", "ill-breeding", "ill-composed",
  "ill-nurtured", "iron-witted", "knotty-pated", "lean-witted", "lily-livered",
  "mad-bread", "milk-livered", "motley-minded", "muddy-mettled", "onion-eyed",
  "pale-hearted", "paper-faced", "pinch-spotted", "plume-plucked",
  "pottle-deep", "pox-marked", "raw-boned", "reeling-ripe", "rough-hewn",
  "rude-growing", "rug-headed", "rump-fed", "shag-eared", "shard-borne",
  "sheep-biting", "shrill-gorged", "spur-galled", "sour-faced", "swag-bellied",
  "tardy-gaited", "tickle-brained", "toad-spotted", "unchin-snouted",
  "weak-hinged", "weather-bitten", "white-livered")

nouns = WordList:new("apple-john", "baggage", "barnacle", "bladder", "boar-pig",
  "bugbear", "bum-bailey", "canker-blossom", "clack-dish", "clotpole",
  "coxcomb", "codpiece", "crutch", "cutpurse", "death-token", "dewberry",
  "dogfish", "egg-shell", "flap-dragon", "flax-wench", "flirt-gill",
  "foot-licker", "fustilarian", "giglet", "gudgeon", "gull-catcher", "haggard",
  "harpy", "hedge-pig", "hempseed", "horn-beast", "hugger-mugger",
  "jack-a-nape", "jolthead", "lewdster", "lout", "maggot-pie", "malignancy",
  "malkin", "malt-worm", "mammet", "manikin", "measle", "minimus", "minnow",
  "miscreant", "moldwarp", "mumble-news", "nut-hook", "pantaloon", "pigeon-egg",
  "pignut", "puttock", "pumpion", "rabbit-sucker", "rampallion", "ratsbane",
  "remnant", "rudesby", "ruffian", "scantling", "scullion", "scut",
  "skainsmate", "snipe", "strumpet", "varlot", "vassal", "waterfly",
  "whey-face", "whipster", "wagtail", "younker")

function curse()
  local adjective1 = adjectives1:pick()
  local adjective2 = adjectives2:pick()
  local noun = nouns:pick()
  return string.format('Thou %s %s %s!', adjective1, adjective2, noun)
end

local num
if #arg > 0 then
  if arg[1] == '-h' then
    print(string.format(
      'Usage: %s [-h] [n] (n is the number of curses you want)', arg[0]))
    os.exit(false)
  end
  num = math.tointeger(arg[1])
  if not num then
    io.stderr:write('Not a valid number: ', arg[1], '\n')
    os.exit(false)
  end
else
  repeat
    io.write('Number of curses: ')
    num = math.tointeger(io.read('l'))
  until num
end

for i = 1, num do
  print(curse())
end